An Embarrassing Moment

A few years ago our High School graduating class was preparing for a reunion.  A questionnaire was sent out so a bio could be put together for each person.  One question was, “What has been your most embarrassing moment?”  I choose to tell of the time I was riding a shopping cart down a ramp in front of our local Kroger store and ended up turning a flip in the parking lot. 

I could easily have chosen the time I made a midnight stop at the Tennessee Welcome Center and absent mindedly used the women’s restroom.  Or the evening we were meticulously cleaning a table at Taco Bell only to have a lady nearby say, “Excuse me, but your son is eating a cigarette butt out of the ashtray.” 

Now I have another one to add to the list. 

Last Thursday evening I was in a big rush to mow the lawn.  It had been a couple of weeks, and I wasn’t going to have another opportunity for a while, so I hurried into the bedroom to change before getting started.  Beginning in front by the busy street, I eventually worked my way to the shady backyard. 

Worried that I was almost out of gas I was literally running by the time I finish up.  Wearily plopping down in an Adirondack chair it was refreshing to lean my head back and catch a few deep breathes.  I looked around admiring at the freshly cut lawn and was thankful for beating an approaching storm.  Inside the house I could see Diana preparing the taco salad we were having for dinner.  Then lowering my gaze I made the frightful discovery.  I had mowed the entire lawn in my underwear.    

All the family had a hilarious laugh about it.  I did, too.

I think that vulnerability can feel a bit like this moment… and it isn’t so funny. To tell others our closet struggles, persistent failures and secret addictions can be embarrassing and frightening. It’s like being introduced to our greatest fear when it comes to spilling out our lives to others.  What hurtful things will they say?  Will I be rebuked and embarrassed?  How will it change our relationship?   

Yet, there should be no safer place to drop our guard, share our true stories and find hope than in the church.   We are after all more like a M.A.S.H. unit for continued healing in our lives than we are a fortress of saints who have reached perfection.  An embarrassing moment should collide with hope.