Changing in Relationships

A compelling and coherent way of life is formed in authentic communities.  In other words, it is in a relationship with others that our beliefs take on a lived quality.  We can only show unquenchable grace to someone who has messed up and does not deserve grace.  Forgiveness can only be extended or received when someone has been wronged.  Hospitality is practiced to others.  In relational community we love, serve and live in harmony with one another. 

I have dozens of relationships – with my wife, my children, co-workers, church community, neighbors and extended family.  Sometimes in this community of people I’m encouraged, at other times I’m challenged. Sometimes I’m frustrated and I also frustrate. Often I blow it.

A few Sundays ago we were on the way to meet with the church.  I was upset that morning.  Diana was upset that I was upset.  We drove in silence except for the occasional short one sentence remark.  Instead of going to the service we dropped the girls off at the door and headed out to the parking lot of a local gift store.  There we spent a couple of hours talking.  It was tense at times.  We uncovered some pretty unflattering things about ourselves.  

It seems that our interior selves frequently surface in the outworking of our relationship. It is there we often see the need to change. 

This does not mean we need to try harder to live up to a set of ideals.  God does not assign us this heavy burden.  He doesn’t say if we work hard enough, are creative enough, confident enough, disciplined enough, organized enough, good enough we will measure up. 

Instead Christ makes Himself available in a transformational companionship.  Firmly establishing love, joy, patience and kindness in our inner being.  He uses the rub of relationships to reveal our need, to give us Himself, and change us from the inside out.